I vehemently believe that I'm not creative.
I can create things that no one can seem to imitate or even comprehend how it's done, but I don't see it as creativity.
Click here to see my art gallery.
I only call it art because other people do. Art should make you stop and stare at it, even if it's only a second. It should make your eyes wander over it. I don't think my art does that. It makes people say "Oh that's cool," and move on. It's only "cool" because I'm their friend and because they've probably never seen anything like it. I need to learn how to create my visions into a reality. Photoshop is something I'm pretty good at, but I'm not that talented. I know enough though. Even so, I don't have the patience to learn how to draw in photoshop. I'm one to take shortcuts.
My poetry is ok, I suppose. I keep hearing that it captures emotion well, or something of that sort, but it's not exactly what I feel. If anything, my emotion is understated. I could be feeling a fiery rage enough to light my keyboard on fire, but as I type my poetry, it's just a bit more than a smolder in my poetry.
However, how are my readers to know that? In my poetry, that's what it seems that I'm feeling.
I seem to lack the ability to translate what I see in my head to something I've created. It's my own fault for not trying harder. For not doing more to learn how to do this or that. However, I've learned that I'm not so bad at drawing a woman's profile, of their face that is. Shading is my weak point. To the untrained eye, you don't even notice it. To someone who knows art, well they can tell you that there needs to be more contrast and more shading.
I crave to do something less abstract, something more meaningful. Something I'd be proud to show someone. Is it sad that I've been getting more and more ashamed of my abstract art? That I've become less and less fulfilled with it?
If you talk to any artist who can draw something they see in a room in 10 minutes, they probably wouldn't see much fulfillment in it either. It was just a quick sketch to them. To others, it's detailed and captured the image perfectly. For me, every single one of those abstract artpieces took me about 10 minutes, some times more and most times less, and I find it frustrating that it's not the kind of art I want to create, but it's the only kind I'm good at.
Is it obvious I'm self pitying? I really can't help it. It's one of my character flaws. One of the many.
I ramble about the same old stuff don't I?
If not Scott, then college, if not college, than friends, if not friends than family, if not family than art.
Sometimes drivers ed too.
I suffer a life of monotony.
It could be worse. It could be a life of hardship.
Showing posts with label art. Show all posts
Showing posts with label art. Show all posts
July 26, 2010
July 3, 2010
Artsy Stuffs
Don't you ever wish you had a talent you asked for? As opposed to naturally having?
Like singers. They just have a beautiful voice to start with. Yes they may require some fine tuning but any professional would tell someone not to sing if they didn't have what they needed to start with.
What if, though, you wanted to dance? Or cook? And was able to be as great as your grandmother or, I don't know, Shakira?
Me? I wish that sometimes. I mean cooking you can learn from family and that's free. Or so I'd hope.
I can write. To an extent. I can write poems. I can write stories. I don't feel as though I'm that great. I'm told I can pour my emotions into my poems. Honestly, not even half of my emotions are in my poems. If they did, there might be cuss words and utter hatred constantly placed in them. I don't know though. Maybe if I look back on them in a few years I'll be able to see it better.
I can draw really weird, abstract stuff. I take pictures of the sky, I photoshop, make jewelry, corsages and bouttenieres. All of this, I never really count as much. It always amazes me how much people love my art. I do call it art, but I never call it all that great unless I really love it. It's just what I do.
What I want to do, something I'd love to have a talent for is dancing. I want to tango, waltz, belly dance, heck, even swing dance. I want to learn all that and more. It's hard work. It's probably a lot of money for the classes too.
Dancing is a fluid way of expression. It's sensual when with a partner. It's drop dead sexy. And that's just watching two talented dancers doing something they're good at. I couldn't even imagine what it must feel like dancing like that with someone.
I doubt I have the natural talent, but with enough training, I'm sure I could be good enough. I want to dance for a few reasons. One is that I could lose weight while doing it, but that's just a plus. I think I've come to accept my rubinesque figure. The main reason is because it's just so beautiful to watch, why not want in on it? Another is that I'd love to dance with someone so intimately. It's so romantic to me.
It's like an artform to me. I want to learn how to embrace my confidence and body like that. It takes a sense of humor to dance badly in front of people. It takes confidence to tango sexily with an audience. Of course... that's what I think, I haven't done either. So don't take my word for it haha.
I have some really artsy friends who can draw pretty much pefectly. One can do it in chalk, because that's her medium. And by "her medium", I mean that chalk is what works best for her, like what she can understand best and use to make her vision. I have a few friends who use just a pen and/or pencil, but it's just jaw droppingly amazing. Some are great with photoshop, which is also breath taking.
Me? I'm ok. My medium is pen/ink. Chalk I suck at. Paint, I suck even worse at. Wire I've found that I'm pretty good with. And hot glue. I'm like in love with hot glue. I don't know why, but I love using it. Oh and it's an "art" medium to me because I use it when I make jewelry. I layer it. It doesn't give the glassy effect that I want though.
This is just a random post with more positivity and to express my undying desire to dance. If I could dance like Shakira, I wouldn't be rubinesque anymore, but damn, that would take sooo much training haha. And who would I show my dancing talents to? My boyfriend? Ha! Yo no tengo un novio... For those who don't know Spanish, that says "I don't have a boyfriend." I don't know why I say stuff in Spanish randomly. I just like to.
I'm weird like that. ^_^
Like singers. They just have a beautiful voice to start with. Yes they may require some fine tuning but any professional would tell someone not to sing if they didn't have what they needed to start with.
What if, though, you wanted to dance? Or cook? And was able to be as great as your grandmother or, I don't know, Shakira?
Me? I wish that sometimes. I mean cooking you can learn from family and that's free. Or so I'd hope.
I can write. To an extent. I can write poems. I can write stories. I don't feel as though I'm that great. I'm told I can pour my emotions into my poems. Honestly, not even half of my emotions are in my poems. If they did, there might be cuss words and utter hatred constantly placed in them. I don't know though. Maybe if I look back on them in a few years I'll be able to see it better.
I can draw really weird, abstract stuff. I take pictures of the sky, I photoshop, make jewelry, corsages and bouttenieres. All of this, I never really count as much. It always amazes me how much people love my art. I do call it art, but I never call it all that great unless I really love it. It's just what I do.
What I want to do, something I'd love to have a talent for is dancing. I want to tango, waltz, belly dance, heck, even swing dance. I want to learn all that and more. It's hard work. It's probably a lot of money for the classes too.
Dancing is a fluid way of expression. It's sensual when with a partner. It's drop dead sexy. And that's just watching two talented dancers doing something they're good at. I couldn't even imagine what it must feel like dancing like that with someone.
I doubt I have the natural talent, but with enough training, I'm sure I could be good enough. I want to dance for a few reasons. One is that I could lose weight while doing it, but that's just a plus. I think I've come to accept my rubinesque figure. The main reason is because it's just so beautiful to watch, why not want in on it? Another is that I'd love to dance with someone so intimately. It's so romantic to me.
It's like an artform to me. I want to learn how to embrace my confidence and body like that. It takes a sense of humor to dance badly in front of people. It takes confidence to tango sexily with an audience. Of course... that's what I think, I haven't done either. So don't take my word for it haha.
I have some really artsy friends who can draw pretty much pefectly. One can do it in chalk, because that's her medium. And by "her medium", I mean that chalk is what works best for her, like what she can understand best and use to make her vision. I have a few friends who use just a pen and/or pencil, but it's just jaw droppingly amazing. Some are great with photoshop, which is also breath taking.
Me? I'm ok. My medium is pen/ink. Chalk I suck at. Paint, I suck even worse at. Wire I've found that I'm pretty good with. And hot glue. I'm like in love with hot glue. I don't know why, but I love using it. Oh and it's an "art" medium to me because I use it when I make jewelry. I layer it. It doesn't give the glassy effect that I want though.
This is just a random post with more positivity and to express my undying desire to dance. If I could dance like Shakira, I wouldn't be rubinesque anymore, but damn, that would take sooo much training haha. And who would I show my dancing talents to? My boyfriend? Ha! Yo no tengo un novio... For those who don't know Spanish, that says "I don't have a boyfriend." I don't know why I say stuff in Spanish randomly. I just like to.
I'm weird like that. ^_^
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